Breakdowns.

Yo.

Last night I was minding my own business, watching Oz The Great and Powerful on my phone while David drove when I noticed the truck stopped moving. He had pulled over because he felt something wrong with the truck. We towed to the main Central terminal here in Utah, thankfully it was not far at all and they took a closer look into it. Turns out the U Joint was shot and the drive shaft had a huge crack in it. David was bummed out, I was thinking one thing... Finally a day off. We slept in the truck last night and this morning took it to Peterbilt, lo and behold they said it will take at least a day to fix. So stoked! We went back to the terminal because they have dorms for drivers in situations like this as well as food and showers and all of that stuff. All of the dorms were full and so they paid for a hotel. I ate the biggest breakfast I've probably ever had of an 8oz steak, eggs, potatoes, biscuits and gravy (it was only seven bucks at the terminal! And it was amazing!!) because the day before all I had to eat was a corn dog and a Hostess rip-off cupcake. We took a shuttle to the hotel we'll be staying at and geez louise... This is the nicest hotel I've ever stayed in. Which isn't saying much since all I've stayed in is crack motels, but still, I am very impressed. I feel like I'm on vacation here.

Salt Lake City is a boring place but damn, do they have some views. I tried my best not to be a mark but I had to take a picture of the backdrop. No matter where you look, if you are looking past the buildings, you are surrounded by gorgeous, snow topped, mountains. I love it.

I can't really think of anything to write about right now. We lost the load we were about to pick up which was going to Arizona (big whoop) and we won't know where we are going next until they get the truck back to us. I am hoping for one more day off, but I'll be ready tomorrow.

David on the Lawrence Arms: *comes out of sleeping area of truck* "Is that your music?! I thought you hit fuckin' garbage cans with my truck, man! I hate this stuff. Awful awful."

Bear out.

Live from camp Iowa.

Howdy.

So I know I mentioned before that after you get your Class A you go out on the road with a trainer, and since Central runs everywhere in the lower 48 of this great country and also Canada (which I won't be going because I don't have a passport and I'm sure there are some other permit hababaloo involved, not interested. Sorry, Canada) that means that you will be sent anywhere you are needed. The thought of having no idea where I'm going to be two days from now is exciting and more than a little frightening. I'm not scared of being far away from home (that's a lie) but moreso of the areas I'll be and how I know I am going to get lost. But I've got a wedding on my mind and I will go anywhere to get that job done.

Our first load sent us from California to Illinois, which right from the start was rad because I've never been there. So stoked. My trainer is this little dude named David from Columbia who literally works nine months out of the year straight and then goes home for three months to be with his wife. The trainers are paid SO damn well. They make, starting, $1.06 a mile for every mile they run AND every mile their trainee runs. It's insane. This week alone we ran over six thousand miles. Yeah. One week. Crazy Columbians... But this particular is also leasing the truck we are in so he has to pay for his own fuel (something I WON'T be doing as a company driver) as well as any maintenance on the truck. He has a pretty thick accent and more than once already I've smiled and nodded at the things he's said. I feel like I am the one that doesn't know the language, especially considering that he is pretty much the only person I speak to. He says some pretty funny stuff when he doesn't mean to and we've recently discovered that he hates punk rock. That's good to know for him, but I'm still listening to it on the regular.

Anyway, we make our way East having a gay ol' time, get to Illinois and we are early for our drop so we have the rest of the day to kill. I am sitting inside the truck stop and watching TV when I hear about these crazy tornadoes. I'm a California boy, tornadoes terrify me and in my opinion are just Hell coming straight from the sky. Turns out that we missed the tornado that decimated Oklahoma by just a few hours. I am not okay with that. For the rest of the day I was just checking the weather channel app and looking at warnings. I was so stinkin' close to the danger zone there, dude, I didn't sleep AT ALL that night. I was waking myself up and also every little noise that was slightly menacing made my eyes open up like that Don't Wake Daddy game (you remember). Truck motors starting up, in my head, sounded like trees being uprooted and coming straight for me. Obviously, I made it through (or I am writing from beyond the graaaaaaave... Or sitting in a Flying J in Iowa listening to Rocket From the Crypt. One of those two).
After that trip we went back to Utah, which was boring, nothing fun about a Mormon state. Then the big one. We got sent to New Jersey. Gaaaaaaaah!! I was doing my best to be cool about how excited I was. Gaslight Anthem, dude. Bigwig. MOTHERFUCKING BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN. Sure it was like two thousand miles away, and it's not like I can site see, but just being there was awesome. It is honestly, from what I saw, a beautiful little place. Granted, this is May and it's pretty much nice everywhere I've been so far, but still. WOW. I saw the New York skyline. Never thought I would see that. Also drove through North Eastern traffic on a weekend and didn't hit anything, so that really eased my mind and made me much more comfortable driving that beastie.

Something that I am noticing though is that, yeah, these places are cool, and are places I've wanted to go, but man, it's not that fun with no one to share it with. I text my friends and family and they usually responded excited for me, but I just wish they were with me. Moments aren't so special with no one but a tiny man with a language barrier to share them with. Eyes on the prize though.

I've got a lot more to write about (a town in Pennsylvania owned by Hershey and was MEGA creepy) but the wheels gotta' keep rollin'. Nothin' but love, I'm doing my best to update often, honest promise.

David on Kid Dynamite (said with accent, and not meant to be funny): "What the hell is this?! It sounds cats are fighting while being ran over!! Ugh!! You're giving me a headache."

Bear out.

Burnin' diesel.

Went from Illinois to Utah, back to Illinois, to Indiana. Now to New Jersey, Pennsylvania and then back to Utah.

I need to post more but AT&T decided it would be cool to turn off my internet if I am roaming even though I have unlimited data. Also, with the trainer we are switching off driving and are always moving. Remaining positive.

Bear out.

Landscapes

Sorry for the lack of posts, I know how everyone holds their breath between these. I'm in Illinois today stuck at a truck stop because of tornadoes and getting to our drop off too early.

It was pretty crazy with the tornado scare today. I drove through Oklahoma City, Joplin, Kansas City and a lot of the other little towns that the tornadoes touched down in just yesterday and this morning. Missed one literally by two hours. Call it what you want, but for me a little faith goes a long way.

Anyway, I'm doing this from my phone and you know how annoying that is. Tomorrow I will probably be able to update from my computer. That's good. Good night, cats.

Bear out.

You are here.

Let's roll.

Leaving at seven in the morning. Don't know when I'll be back. Making so many Chuck Ragan and Bruce Springsteen playlists.

The Disaster March

After you pass your written test, learn how to drive an eighty thousand pound vehicle, get your Class A license, go through orientation, map out a bunch of hypothetical trips, play nice at the hotel and blow all of your money on McDonald's and Del Taco your next step is to go out on the road for four or five weeks (two hundred driving hours required) with a trainer. After you get back you get your own truck and ta-da; you're a truck driver. This has been the part of the process that I've been looking forward to the very least... being out on the road with a complete stranger at arm's length telling you about how the truck is "his house". I'm trying to keep a positive attitude about it, because really this whole process is a keep-your-head-down-and-get-through-it type deal, but this phase just gives me the creeps. I don't think I could sit in that small of a space with my best friends. 

Today I found out who my trainer is and when I'm leaving which is late Thursday night or early Friday morning. They gave me my trainer's number and told me to call him so that we have each other in our phones and he can let me know when he'll be picking me up. It felt like being drafted. No one knew where they were going, you can only hope for the best and to not end up in Cleveland. Looking at the dude's area code, it looks like he is from Northern California, which would be RAD if he was anywhere near Fresno and if he could drop me off on our days off. Not trying to get too high on the idea though. For all I know he may just want me to put the lotion on my skin. 

After I got out of orientation today I went to get some dinner and sat in the restaurant for a pretty long time. I am not second guessing myself or the decisions I've made to get here, but I am incredibly nervous of failing. That's probably why I took so long to tell people about the job and adventure. God, I hope I like this. If not I am so incredibly out of ideas about what to do. The trainers keep saying that it's the raddest job ever because "your truck is your office with a window view that changes every day". That's all well and fine. Let's cross our fingers I see it that way and not a death trap. ANYWAYS... Remaining positive is the only thing I can crutch on. So send them vibes my way. 

Another sentiment I've gotten a few times is the "you better visit me when you're in town". As much as I would love to see all of my friends in different parts of the country, and that really is the truth, I unfortunately do not have much control of where I'm going or how long I will be there. Although there are ways to stay in one spot for a lunch if it is pre-planned. I am VERY much so looking forward to seeing some faces I haven't seen in a long minute, especially considering that the bulk of my friends are spread out through California and random ass parts of this great country and I will do my best to hit you cats up before I roll through. I sincerely hope we can meet up, if only for a handshake, hug or cup of coffee. At some point being alone on a truck is going to make me crazy and a bear like me should never be left to my own devices. Also, please feel free to text me whenever you're bored, as desperate as that sounds. Although I won't be able to respond right away ALL of the time (the fine for having a Class A and being on the phone while you're driving is $2750 rupees, and I ain't got a big Goron wallet yet) I would really enjoy knowing that I'm in my friend's and family's thoughts. 

I should get a dog. I miss my guitar. How many peanut butter and jelly sandwiches is too many?

Bear out. 

Seeing is believing.

Here's the yard and truck that I tested in.

I am disappeared pt. 2 (disappeared harder)

First of all... Whoa. Over one hundred views on my last post. I was expecting ten or twenty, so that's quite the shocker. Thanks, cats. 

Secondly, my bad on no post yesterday. I really intended to but I visited home one more time before heading out on the road for five weeks and when I got back to Fontana on Monday I had to go to an orientation, went back to the hotel and slept for twelve hours. So let's jump right into it. 

The yard: the actual behind-the-wheel training portion is done by a different company called Truck Driving Academy (inspired name...) which operates a truck yard right across the street from the Central Refrigerated terminal. Because they are so close and are way experienced they are licensed to actually give you your behind the wheel test the same as if you are at the DMV. This was rad because not only do you already know the guys doing your test but since they were the ones that trained you, you can blame them for anything  you do wrong (joke... sort of). The first few days were so bloody hot they are almost a blur. It's mostly just walking around the truck learning all of the parts of the outside inspection. The first time actually driving the truck was horrifying. It's so astoundingly huge and you can easily EASILY crush damn near anything. I had never driven a stick shift (which I lied about to the trainers) and these trucks are double clutch. I stalled that thing SO many times before I figured out what I was doing. Once I got going and on the road the only thing I could concentrate on was the double clutch and the terrified faces of the cars when I'm making a right turn and in huge letters on the truck it says "STUDENT DRIVER". If nothing else comes of this those looks alone were worth it. Luckily during the entire time out in the yard I didn't hit anything. Although my roommate did and it was such a bummer (enter dumb hick ape). My actual test had me so nervous, and of course I got the strictest tester in the yard. You know when you do something right and you look for assurance that it was done correctly by even a slight smile or nod or anything? Yeah, none of that. I had no idea if anything I said was correct or if I was doing well. There was one time where I know I messed up pretty bad and was sure that was the end of the test and I would have to retest the next day, which would have been a huge bummer because then I wouldn't get to go back to Fresno for the weekend and visit my family one more time. On the way back into the yard after the test the tester got me out of the driver's seat and drove back in on his own. He didn't say a word to me and it stressed me out so much. We got out of the truck and he told me to follow him to his car where we could talk. Completely straight faced. He lit up a cigarette, took a looooong drag and said "so were you a safe driver?"... shit. I don't know. Isn't that your job to know?! In the end, I passed. He just definitely wanted me to remember my mistakes thus the dramatics and with that I got my Class A license. 

As I said before I met a few rad dudes in the hotel. We all went out to a cheap Chinese buffet and looked like the most sloppily put together group of people. There was a black dude from South Central L.A., a Hmong dude from Fresno, a white guy from San Diego, a retired cholo from L.A. and a punk rock Puerto Rican (that's me). Pretty unlikely A-Team. We also went to see Iron Man 3 (which kind of sucked, but you're not here for my witty movie reviews). 

The question I got the most after my last entry was how I came to trucking. Honestly, I surprised myself when I made the decision. Back in January my buddy's dad was looking for drivers for the company he worked for, needless to say he didn't hire me but that got the hamster running. Thinking about it; what other job was going to let me rarely interact with humans, listen to music all day, see the country, not stress about covering tattoos and pay me more money than I ever thought I would make? If any of you have a better idea, well then I'm all ears. 

Another question a buddy asked is how I paid for the schooling part of it (he knows I'm as broke as a bad joke somebody's uncle told at a wedding reception in 1972). How it works with this company is that they front you the tuition, put you through the training and you pay them back the loan once you're actually out on the road. You can pay it off however fast or slow as you want, it's a three thousand dollar tuition, but if you stay with the company for one year they drop it down to fifteen hundred. I don't know if I will stay the full year, which I will prorated on for the tuition, because I will probably actively seek a local job as oppose to one that runs all 48 states. But time will tell. I will enjoy the runs but missing my family and Veronica will be overwhelming after a while, I'm sure. I can bring a dog onto the truck, and I am strongly considering that to keep my sanity and because I've been wanting a dog for a LONG time now. 

So that brings me to now. Sitting back in an Econolodge, listening to Dillinger Four while my roommate watches the news. From here on out I can promise that the entries won't be as dry (I feel bad for anyone who reads this whole thing) and there will be way more to talk about than school and yard. Starting on Thursday or Friday I will be heading out with a trainer for four or five weeks running loads and learning all about the do's and don'ts of lot lizards, Flying J showers, crystal meth and not killing myself in the snow. Looking forward to it. 

We will try to make this a daily thing, even if it's only a picture. Keep checking back and I will keep blowing you digital kisses. 

Bear out. 

I am disappeared.

DISCLAIMER: In all reality, I won't proof read any of this. So the many grammatical errors should be overlooked. Also, I will try to keep my cussing to a minimum, but just know it will be there.

Hello family, friends and feather weather friends alike. Let me start this out by acknowledging and apologizing my radio silence for the past months. In times of uncertainty and doubt I suppose I've found it best to keep my focus on a goal to get things back on track. But enough cryptic bullshit and let's cut to the chase and why I'm even starting this silly little composition.

For those who don't know, and I can imagine that's the majority of people, I am no longer at Alorica and have for the past few weeks attended a truck driving academy to get my Class A license so I can start driving semi trucks in Fontana, CA. Out of left field, right?! Travelling has always been an ideal job for me and since I can't seem to keep a band together, this seemed like a pretty damn good alternative for someone with my qualifications (read: none). Just this past Friday I passed my final test for the license and come Monday I start orientation for Central Refrigerated. Preeeetty stoked and nervous. Which brings me to this blog; my goal here is to have those who care to know my whereabouts and my whatsgoingons a, hopefully, constant feed. No epiphanies or funny business here. Just an online journal I suppose. I will try my best to keep up with it and post as many pictures as I can remember to take as well as my miles, where I'm at and if I get abducted and anally probed by aliens.

Without further ado, let's get into the first actual entry and talk about the training that led me up to this point. It may be a little dry, but just hang with me:

Training for me started on April 29th, meaning I had to trek down to Fontana (which, for those too lazy to Google it, is about an hour East of L.A.) on the 28th. One cool thing about this particular company is that they pay for damn near everything, at their convenience of course. Central purchased my Greyhound ticket and paid for my housing for the duration of the time I was going to be away from home. Now if you have not taken a Greyhound before, or if you have and haven't been their new buses, it's really not a bad deal. All of their newer buses have wifi, outlets and decently comfortable chairs so the trip itself wasn't too bad, especially leaving from Fresno and making sure that I was there early enough to get a seat to myself. My older sister bought me some rad over-the-ear headphones which have become my best friends for my birthday in March and between that and Game of Thrones it was relatively uneventful. After the ten hour trip on the Greyhound (only one layover which was in the Toy District of downtown L.A. [trust me, not as fun as it sounds... that place is horrifying]) I found myself waiting at the bus station in San Bernardino for the hotel shuttle to get me. I made a huge goddamn mistake by placing my backpack on the floor as the place was COVERED in cockroaches the size of my fucking thumb. Bugs do not sit well with me at all so for the twenty or so minutes it took for the shuttle to come get me, I stood outside carrying my backpack, messenger bag, pillow (with sleeping bag stuffed in with my pillow) above my head and staring at the floor so I would have plenty of time to crush any brave cockroach that decided they wanted to tango. This night will be known as the "what the hell did I get myself into... I want to go home already" night. That phrase will be a theme for the first night. Once the shuttle finally did decide to show up and take me to the hotel, it was already ten at night and there were no more non smoking rooms available so I got stuck in smelliest goddamn room possible. I've slept in crackhead houses using only a smelly curtain as a blanket and complained less than I could about this room. I can not understate how much this place reeked of smoke and sadness. Sleazy hotel? Check. Roaches crawling on my stuff? Check. Random people talking to me (a pretty big pet peeve of mine... Seriously)? Check check check. I found a way to sleep and made it through the worst night there. Thankfully it was all downhill from that point on.

The next day the shuttle comes to take us to the training building at 6:00am. We go through pretty standard pre-job stuff. Piss in a cup, fill out a bajillion papers and the like. The only difference here is that you have to have a physical in order to get your Class A. Eye site, hearing, blood pressure and a physical. I'm a young, healthy buck, and aside from a slightly unexpected turn-your-head-and-cough ball grab by the doctor conducting the physical it was an alright experience. Next we file into a room with the oldest, most pissed off little Irish dude who will be our classroom teacher for the better part of the week. The other employees there called him Grandpa and he acted like what I can imagine an Irish grandpa would. Swore and made racist/sexist/hilarious jokes pretty much the whole time. While watching a sexual harassment video he writes on the white board "Sexual Harassment: Just don't be a pussy". Pretty good stuff. This portion of the training is just to get you to pass the DMV written test and it was pretty effective. I don't think a single person failed the written test, and there were some dumb people in there. I can't say much else about the classroom portion because it was pretty damn straight forward.

After the written test portion of training we started going to the truck yard to actually learn how to drive the beasts. The instructors there were pretty rad dudes and to say it was laid back would be a crime of an understatement. Tomorrow I will go more into detail about the driving and the yard experience but for this first entry I want to change gears real quick and talk about the living situation real quick...

So when you attend the Fontana training program you always have a roommate. I was lucky enough to have two rad roommates and unfortunate enough to have a rude fucking ape for one night. My first roommate in the stinky room came in, dropped his bags off and left for the entire night, probably because he couldn't stand the smell. So no complaints there. The next day they gave a me non-smoking room with the roommate I would have for the majority of the time I was there. Rad dude, lived clean, didn't fuck with or steal any of my stuff, watched sports and had a sense of humor. Unfortunately he did not make it through the training and for the last night I was there they gave me one more roommate who sucked so goddamn bad. He was a huge hick from Georgia who couldn't control the volume of his voice even the slightest (which is saying something coming from me). This dude literally woke me up to ask if I was asleep. He smelled like ass AFTER showering and talked to me non stop (remember my hate for being talked to by randoms... especially while I am wearing my headphones and clearly have no interest in talking). So much talking to the point where I ended up sitting in the restroom with the shower on just so I could get away from him. It was terrible.

I met a few other rad dudes there as well, one from Fresno who passed his Class A exams the same day I did and drove his car down to Fontana and let me ride back with him for this weekend until we have to be back on Monday for orientation. I'll get more into that story as well as the truck yard tomorrow.

Hit me up through text, email, comment, send a pigeon or facebook me if you have any questions about my adventure. Sorry that this ran long. I can guarantee after the first few entries, they will become shorter, I just have two weeks of stuff to write about. In the future I will also write a little more about more personal stuff like my relationship with my girlfriend who is obviously supportive but bummed about how long I will be away from. But for now we'll get the boring informative stuff out of the way.

Thanks for reading, twerps. Part deuce manana.

Bear out.